Sometimes it would seem that renunciation is not so final- at least in the way most would perceive it. And then life does not seem to have any end or beginning. There are some who truly march to their own beat – and it is the right thing for them. All those who come in contact with such people are only enriched when they look back and see how some axioms of living are shown to them. The legend of Shiva and Parvati a documentary by Krishna Saraswati, tells a story that is not just his own but shows that sometimes some things are stranger than fiction. There are beautiful visuals to support this and it is a journey for all those who wish to see it as such!
The film is not a mythological as the title suggests- in fact it is mostly about the relationship between an ascetic and a German woman who chooses this life in the Himalayas and marries the ascetic and also bears two children – quite contrary to the concept that sadhus must not just stay celibate, but are very cut off from family life.
Shiva is the Day, Parvati the Night; Shiva is the Fire, Parvati the Water;
Shiva is the Heaven, Parvati the Earth and these metaphors are worked into the true story of Renate, who is named Parvati by the yogi or Baba or the master living in the mountainous region in North India.
The entire film reflects the tranquillity of a heritage, that has been handed down to the children who other than wondering about the combination of their parents and the great admiration for the courage they showed by living life on their terms, are totally accepting of a lineage that is unique.
There is love and there is grief; and there is also death and a life lived to the fullest. In the Mountains where the heaven touches earth, lives the passionate God Shiva with his wife, Parvati. That is the belief and that is the devotion-- that evoke some of the greatest poetry and the arts in general. And this mythological tale could be the story of the Indian yogi, who has many followers and disciples—those who have given up a life of materialism and relationships. They revere him as Shiva, whose teaching is about the omnipresent Om.
But then comes a woman, a German, who falls in love with him. His disciples are worried when the two decide to marry. But that is when they realise that their Shiva has found his Parvati.
Nothing lasts and there is nothing that can remain static. Parvati leaves her Shiva as she cannot live with the yogi anymore. She goes back to Germany with her children and brings them up in a more real world. But the spiritualism and the love for the yogi are abiding and not even a remarriage can dilute that.
Later their son recounts how both of them tried to find their own genuine path between legend and reality. The film recounts the way the two came together and how the journey produced some profound thoughts and principles for life.
Magnificent camera work captures the silence and the serenity of the region – it is palpable and reaches out along with the people the director has chosen to tell the entire story. There is profundity in almost every scene and even the way the snail moves on a leaf, has this quality.
Some of the things the associates of the yogi say are eternal truths – beautifully told! For instance, one of them says,’’ he was truly great. There are those who go to the church and think of whores- but here is he, even if he with a whore is only thinking of Shiva.’’ This encapsulates the essence of someone, who is free in every way- even free from the perceived morals!
Krishna Saraswati who steers the film through its narration was born in 1980 in the Himalayan region and spent his early childhood there with his parents. He has been living in Germany since 1985. The Legend of Shiva and Parvati, is his first film and it was made during his studies at the Filmakademie Baden-Württemberg.
The film is about two people he says. ‘’And they happen to be my parents.’’ There is no angst here about anything and that is reflected in the way he says ’I think I was also born with spirituality.’’ With such a tradition, how else would he be?
The younger brother of yogi Saraswathi and his sister who are from Tamil Nadu say he went away at a very young age. But came back much later in life and spent time with all of us, they add. A kind of a conclusion to a magnificent film and story!
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Thursday, August 6, 2009
such a fiesty woman she is
Well, one more of those full of views things -- jus loved talking to her.Such a tremendous actress --articulate, bold and totally unpretentious!!!! Not many like her for sure.
Think Khushboo and the fragrance that her name suggests, is instant – more because here is a woman and an actor, who has sustained her place in the film industry over the years and continues to be popular and very appealing to a majority. There is no question about that. Plus, she is also someone who is admired, perhaps hated and secretly emulated for her outspokenness and living life on her own terms. While this may seem like clichés, this is exactly what her life is about.
From Mumbai to Chennai, the journey has been long and eventful. Starting out with a film that brought her to prominence – Dard Ka Rishta, with Sunil Dutt, Khushboo came down south in what one can call a destiny’s path. Noticed by almost all big names here in the Telugu and Tamil film industry, her career is a success story. Eventful even! Good, bad and some indifferent, have all gone into making her what she stands for today. Ask her about her forays into films and she is instantly bored.’’ Please don’t ask me the routine things. I’m really sick and tired of saying the same thing over and over again. How about we talk about general things,’’ she says.
That’s what happened one dusky evening on her rooftop of her residence at Santhome. Birds chirped around and the sluggish breeze lazily wound itself around us, as we spoke of things in a meandering sort of manner.
How did it all begin?
As a child actor. And the film that really gave me recognition and fame is Dard Ka Rishta. After that, I was doing a few films in Bombay--that’s when D Rama Naidu wanted to launch Venkatesh in Telegu films. Venky saw one of my films and suggested my name. That’s how I moved to the South.
Didn’t ever feel like going back to Bombay?
From the very beginning, Chennai felt like home. I have not been a party going person-- the kind who would like to go out in the evening. Chennai suits me just fine.
When you get into any field in life, other than the fact of known complexities of working have you seen any changes? Do we still need for equality?
No, we don’t have to fight for equality. Success plays a very big role and a lot of people believe in shortcuts to success. But finally it is hard work, the capacity to perform – that really pull you through. What we talk about sexual harassment at the workplace, of all the places I have seen, read about, the film industry is still a far much better place than any other.
And the casting couch syndrome does not exist?
I don’t think it exists. I have not seen it in the 22 years of my career; even when I was a new comer- whether it is the Tamil, Telugu, Kannada or Hindi--I have never seen any person coming, holding my hand and pulling me. No producer is a fool to invest lakhs and crores of rupees in you, for the kind of films that are being made today. And certainly not if he feels you are not worth it--just because you are doing some favours. If you are good, he is going to invest – period. I have seen how women send propositions to my husband who is a director. And since we have a very transparent relationship, we discuss a lot. It is not that we run down the women, but he says,’ look at the desperate moves these girls make to be in the limelight.’’
How does he handle all that?
Very simply—he tells them to ask me. If I said ok, he would be ok to what they suggested too. On a lighter note you know how it is. It is not always the men--the producer or the director – the girls too sometimes are desperate to be in films.
You have been in the industry for such a long time. Are you seeing changes in how women are being perceived from when you started?
Definitely. While it is still a male dominated world, but its not too bad. A heroine is given equal credit. If you talk about being character driven then there is hardly any character worth talking about. Substantial roles are simply not there. The premium seems to be on looking good, glamorous. Yet there are those like Trisha, Tamana, Nayantara, who are not only good looking, but are also making an impact. It is not easy to look glamorous and still last so long. Trisha has been around for quite a while now and has really made it big. It takes a lot of guts to do a role, where all you doing are providing the oomph and the glamour. And surviving.
How about initiating roles for women?
The problem is, we don’t have the multiplex system. If in Bombay you have films centred around the character of the woman, then you have the multiplex system where you make a film on a small budget. Any film which based on the heroine, is not made on a mega-budget. That we can still do here. But people here again are not ready to accept a woman doing a film like Page3, Ashtithva or a Chandani Bar.
Moral policing- has it stopped you from saying things or being the way you are?
Who are the people who do moral policing? I don’t know. We are absolute strangers to them. Why should I fear them? I still speak my mind, I still say what I feel is right because I live in a democratic country, where it gives me the freedom to speak what I want to say until as long as I don’t point a finger at someone and malign them.
What are the issues you would really like speak out on?
One thing I would definitely like to speak out is education for the girl child; sex education in schools from 6th or 7th standard for the girl child, basically sex education. I would defiantly want to work with sex workers to spread the awareness of HIV. That is something people are still unaware of and they don’t want to learn about it.
Are you working on any of these issues?
I am and I do it silently. I don’t publicise it. It is something very personal and I would like to keep it that way.
What is Kushboo as a family person?
(She laughs uproariously) A nagging wife? I nag about everything. About why this or that is not working?
Are you dependent on your husband?
I am not dependent on him. I’m a perfectionist. So when I say this has to be done, it has to be done. And I always tell people that if you cannot do it when I assign you with a job, let me know and I’ll do it. I’m not dependent on you.
What would those jobs be?
Odd jobs; probably going and picking up something for the kids; or probably going and you know things about the house (she was very annoyed about the electricity fittings in the new house that day).
And as a mom?
As a mom, I am strict only when it comes to studies. I am not the kind who will say you have to get cent percent in whatever you are doing. I’ll say, get the green line that you have passed and that is enough for me. But things have to be done on time. Books should not say “incomplete work” or there shouldn’t be any complaints. Unfortunately my children are attached with the tag of being celebrity kids. So extra attention is given to them where ever they go and they are noticed, how they behave. But they are normal children; bound to adamant, cranky. They might come across as being spoilt. So I’m a little extra careful when it comes to their behaviour in public.
Would you call your marriage a happy one?
Well, its not a bed of roses for sure; but then life would be very boring if it was. There are times when we have not talked to each other for weeks. I am on one corner of the bed and he is on the other and the kids in the middle.
How do the children react to these things?
They don’t react at all. When the children are around, we are absolutely normal. We have made an underlying rule that we will not fight in front of the kids and not use any kind of foul language. And when we fight, it not that we are screaming our head off. If he screams, I laugh and he gets bugged; and when I am angry, I throw certain things. Like if I have a handbag I throw it, if I have a book I throw it on the floor and that irritates him.
How did you come to marry Sunder?
I think we had been dating each other for five years and so it was very long. In fact, he was directing his first film when we met and I was already the star.
Did you have an image in your head that this is the kind of guy you wanted to marry?
No, I have never read Mills and Boon, but then all my friends used to say tall, dark and handsome is what he seems. So here he was – tall and handsome, but not very dark fellow. But then the first day of the shooting we were together and my aunt, who was always with me, said it was time I got married and settled down. She saw Sundar pass and said,’’we should find a boy like that. Who is he?’’ And I was hastily trying to quieten her down, saying,’’ he is the director.’’
How were those first few days?
It was a nice unit, a young unit; the director, a first timer; a first time camera man, but they had all worked as assistants together so they had a unity and they were good friends. All of us hit it off, as friends first. And slowly started to get to know Sundar; it was a slow process as he tends to keep to himself and does not talk too much.
How did you get him to talk to you?
Just the opposite, actually. Both of us are on two ends of the spectrum. We were friends and when we started talking, the unit, our friends were wondering. We didn’t even realize how we started liking each other. And on one occasion, when he was supposed to be gone for a few days he came back much faster –and in our shoot we used to play cricket, cards. No caravans to keep to ourselves. And I just asked his camera man,’’ where is Sundar? It is a bit weird without him?’’ And he promptly went and told him that. “Machaaan! Onne miss panara da! ” And Sunder landed up the very next day. I was very happy to see him. That evening actually, Sundar and i were talking and he just turned around and said,’’ If tomorrow we have kids, who will they look like?’’ I said,’’excuse me? ‘’ And he repeated it saying if we kids tomorrow, who will they look like?’’
Is that how he proposed to you?
Yeah, and I asked him,’’are you trying to propose? ‘’oh, I haven’t proposed to you, yet? Ok, fine. Will you marry me? ‘’ It was as simple as that.
And you said, yes?
I immediately said, yes. And that’s it. The very next day, the entire unit knew about it.
And how was the wedding?
It was five years later. Sundar was very keen that he did something before he married me. He comes from a very humble background. He said, I want to give you all the comforts and status you are used to. So unless I buy a house of my own, I will not get married. My mom was a little against it initially, because he comes from a different caste and mom was not sure what kind of a person he is. I had already been hurt once and Mom was very scared. But my brothers were cool about it. They met him and spoke to him and they were happy that I had found a good guy for myself.
But you had to wait five years to marry.
Yeah, that was fine because we were living together. And that is something that depends on the couple; how sure they are of about each other. Of course we had a problem, we broke up in between and we came back and all those fights have happened for us. We broke up for a day and we came back. Also maybe because it was getting to me that the marriage was taking a long time; it was taking its own toll. I was working around the clock and so was he. We were not able to spend so much time together. And on his part he had this basic fear of losing his freedom.
Has the seven year itch made its appearance?
Oh we did not even realise that the seven years has gone past. Once we were shooting and he called me and asked me to come down for it. When I asked why, he said, ‘’no, please come by.’’ And this was when we were dating. I went to the location and he said,’’ I want you to meet somebody.’’ He called a girl and pointed to me and said,’’ do you know who she is? ‘’ She didn’t know that he was dating me. “I have such a wonderful wife back home. Do you think I’ll even turn and look at you”? The girl was really taken aback. And I said, ‘’don’t do that to her.’’ But Sundar felt they needed to know that they need not be so desperate for work?
No woman’s journey into this point in life is without heartaches? We are talking about the Prabhu episode!
it’s a closed chapter. Everybody knows about my one big heartache. Love is blind. But I’m glad I could come out of it. A lot of people are not able to come out of it. I realized what I was doing was wrong. So, I had to come out of it. You never realize how, where and why it happens. There are no answers. I don’t regret it. But then I also know it was a huge mistake. I have shared a beautiful part of my life during that period. It was beautiful till it lasted. But then, definitely a mistake.
How do you see equations in today’s context?
I think we all forget that the basic need in a relationship is time, which we don’t want to give. We want to keep moving on. If it works, fine. If it doesn’t, you move on. That move on tag, should be removed. A marriage has to be worked upon. We all have our problems. Talk it out. I believe there is a solution to every problem. Don’t keep pushing it under the carpet. Because then, by the time you realize there is a heap of problems for which you don’t find solutions to. If it is an abusive marriage, then you have to walk out. A woman can do better when she is alone, all by herself rather than living in an abusive marriage.
You have very strong views on most things. Were you always like this?
I have always believed in being honest. I have seen my mom in an abusive marriage and she never had the chance to leave being uneducated. Today I’m glad she stays with me. I have a wonderful husband who, when we built this house, said ask you mom to come and stay with us. So, my mom, mom-in-law all of us stay together.
What would you ask of life now?
I don’t believe in God. If I have a question, I try to get an answer. And I don’t ask questions to people who I know can’t give answers. I always question a person, whom I know is close to my heart. And I only question when I am hurt. And the person who can hurt me is obviously the person who is close to me. So they are my family and friends and nobody else. It is as simple as that. Life is what you make of it.
So there is no such thing as being destined?
Nobody can foresee the future. I wonder when the last time Bill Gates saw was his astrologer or whether Obama had an astrology chart made. Obama had to work hard to be where he is today and Bill Gates was intelligent enough to make something out of his life. I always want to see my kids smiling, healthy and definitely making something out of their lives. I want my girls to be financially independent. I would like people to stop interfering in everybody else’s lives and take care of their own. Be honest to yourself. Be confident in what you are doing. Even if you falter. Don’t hesitate to say sorry. But if you are not at fault let the world turn upside down, don’t say sorry.
A parting shot?
Take care. That’s my usual line.
I SMILE---
At sight of kids playing in the rain. Probably to hear the giggle of a small kid, the laughter. My day starts with looking at both my kids in the morning. I think that’s the best sight in the world. As my husband puts it, as soon as the school starts, there is a Mahabharata at home every morning till I take them and drop them at school.
I LIKE SHOPPING FOR:
Saris. I love saris. But I am also very comfortable with cotton salwars, mix and match. I hate getting them stitched because invariably the tailors goof up. I love to shop at Fab India, Anokhee.
EATING OUT IS SUCH FUN:
Thai at Lotus and Benjarong. I also like Dakshin at the Park Sheraton.I cook at home and I can make everything except south Indian.
WHAT COLORS ME BEST:
All the earthen shades. Browns and yellows.
Think Khushboo and the fragrance that her name suggests, is instant – more because here is a woman and an actor, who has sustained her place in the film industry over the years and continues to be popular and very appealing to a majority. There is no question about that. Plus, she is also someone who is admired, perhaps hated and secretly emulated for her outspokenness and living life on her own terms. While this may seem like clichés, this is exactly what her life is about.
From Mumbai to Chennai, the journey has been long and eventful. Starting out with a film that brought her to prominence – Dard Ka Rishta, with Sunil Dutt, Khushboo came down south in what one can call a destiny’s path. Noticed by almost all big names here in the Telugu and Tamil film industry, her career is a success story. Eventful even! Good, bad and some indifferent, have all gone into making her what she stands for today. Ask her about her forays into films and she is instantly bored.’’ Please don’t ask me the routine things. I’m really sick and tired of saying the same thing over and over again. How about we talk about general things,’’ she says.
That’s what happened one dusky evening on her rooftop of her residence at Santhome. Birds chirped around and the sluggish breeze lazily wound itself around us, as we spoke of things in a meandering sort of manner.
How did it all begin?
As a child actor. And the film that really gave me recognition and fame is Dard Ka Rishta. After that, I was doing a few films in Bombay--that’s when D Rama Naidu wanted to launch Venkatesh in Telegu films. Venky saw one of my films and suggested my name. That’s how I moved to the South.
Didn’t ever feel like going back to Bombay?
From the very beginning, Chennai felt like home. I have not been a party going person-- the kind who would like to go out in the evening. Chennai suits me just fine.
When you get into any field in life, other than the fact of known complexities of working have you seen any changes? Do we still need for equality?
No, we don’t have to fight for equality. Success plays a very big role and a lot of people believe in shortcuts to success. But finally it is hard work, the capacity to perform – that really pull you through. What we talk about sexual harassment at the workplace, of all the places I have seen, read about, the film industry is still a far much better place than any other.
And the casting couch syndrome does not exist?
I don’t think it exists. I have not seen it in the 22 years of my career; even when I was a new comer- whether it is the Tamil, Telugu, Kannada or Hindi--I have never seen any person coming, holding my hand and pulling me. No producer is a fool to invest lakhs and crores of rupees in you, for the kind of films that are being made today. And certainly not if he feels you are not worth it--just because you are doing some favours. If you are good, he is going to invest – period. I have seen how women send propositions to my husband who is a director. And since we have a very transparent relationship, we discuss a lot. It is not that we run down the women, but he says,’ look at the desperate moves these girls make to be in the limelight.’’
How does he handle all that?
Very simply—he tells them to ask me. If I said ok, he would be ok to what they suggested too. On a lighter note you know how it is. It is not always the men--the producer or the director – the girls too sometimes are desperate to be in films.
You have been in the industry for such a long time. Are you seeing changes in how women are being perceived from when you started?
Definitely. While it is still a male dominated world, but its not too bad. A heroine is given equal credit. If you talk about being character driven then there is hardly any character worth talking about. Substantial roles are simply not there. The premium seems to be on looking good, glamorous. Yet there are those like Trisha, Tamana, Nayantara, who are not only good looking, but are also making an impact. It is not easy to look glamorous and still last so long. Trisha has been around for quite a while now and has really made it big. It takes a lot of guts to do a role, where all you doing are providing the oomph and the glamour. And surviving.
How about initiating roles for women?
The problem is, we don’t have the multiplex system. If in Bombay you have films centred around the character of the woman, then you have the multiplex system where you make a film on a small budget. Any film which based on the heroine, is not made on a mega-budget. That we can still do here. But people here again are not ready to accept a woman doing a film like Page3, Ashtithva or a Chandani Bar.
Moral policing- has it stopped you from saying things or being the way you are?
Who are the people who do moral policing? I don’t know. We are absolute strangers to them. Why should I fear them? I still speak my mind, I still say what I feel is right because I live in a democratic country, where it gives me the freedom to speak what I want to say until as long as I don’t point a finger at someone and malign them.
What are the issues you would really like speak out on?
One thing I would definitely like to speak out is education for the girl child; sex education in schools from 6th or 7th standard for the girl child, basically sex education. I would defiantly want to work with sex workers to spread the awareness of HIV. That is something people are still unaware of and they don’t want to learn about it.
Are you working on any of these issues?
I am and I do it silently. I don’t publicise it. It is something very personal and I would like to keep it that way.
What is Kushboo as a family person?
(She laughs uproariously) A nagging wife? I nag about everything. About why this or that is not working?
Are you dependent on your husband?
I am not dependent on him. I’m a perfectionist. So when I say this has to be done, it has to be done. And I always tell people that if you cannot do it when I assign you with a job, let me know and I’ll do it. I’m not dependent on you.
What would those jobs be?
Odd jobs; probably going and picking up something for the kids; or probably going and you know things about the house (she was very annoyed about the electricity fittings in the new house that day).
And as a mom?
As a mom, I am strict only when it comes to studies. I am not the kind who will say you have to get cent percent in whatever you are doing. I’ll say, get the green line that you have passed and that is enough for me. But things have to be done on time. Books should not say “incomplete work” or there shouldn’t be any complaints. Unfortunately my children are attached with the tag of being celebrity kids. So extra attention is given to them where ever they go and they are noticed, how they behave. But they are normal children; bound to adamant, cranky. They might come across as being spoilt. So I’m a little extra careful when it comes to their behaviour in public.
Would you call your marriage a happy one?
Well, its not a bed of roses for sure; but then life would be very boring if it was. There are times when we have not talked to each other for weeks. I am on one corner of the bed and he is on the other and the kids in the middle.
How do the children react to these things?
They don’t react at all. When the children are around, we are absolutely normal. We have made an underlying rule that we will not fight in front of the kids and not use any kind of foul language. And when we fight, it not that we are screaming our head off. If he screams, I laugh and he gets bugged; and when I am angry, I throw certain things. Like if I have a handbag I throw it, if I have a book I throw it on the floor and that irritates him.
How did you come to marry Sunder?
I think we had been dating each other for five years and so it was very long. In fact, he was directing his first film when we met and I was already the star.
Did you have an image in your head that this is the kind of guy you wanted to marry?
No, I have never read Mills and Boon, but then all my friends used to say tall, dark and handsome is what he seems. So here he was – tall and handsome, but not very dark fellow. But then the first day of the shooting we were together and my aunt, who was always with me, said it was time I got married and settled down. She saw Sundar pass and said,’’we should find a boy like that. Who is he?’’ And I was hastily trying to quieten her down, saying,’’ he is the director.’’
How were those first few days?
It was a nice unit, a young unit; the director, a first timer; a first time camera man, but they had all worked as assistants together so they had a unity and they were good friends. All of us hit it off, as friends first. And slowly started to get to know Sundar; it was a slow process as he tends to keep to himself and does not talk too much.
How did you get him to talk to you?
Just the opposite, actually. Both of us are on two ends of the spectrum. We were friends and when we started talking, the unit, our friends were wondering. We didn’t even realize how we started liking each other. And on one occasion, when he was supposed to be gone for a few days he came back much faster –and in our shoot we used to play cricket, cards. No caravans to keep to ourselves. And I just asked his camera man,’’ where is Sundar? It is a bit weird without him?’’ And he promptly went and told him that. “Machaaan! Onne miss panara da! ” And Sunder landed up the very next day. I was very happy to see him. That evening actually, Sundar and i were talking and he just turned around and said,’’ If tomorrow we have kids, who will they look like?’’ I said,’’excuse me? ‘’ And he repeated it saying if we kids tomorrow, who will they look like?’’
Is that how he proposed to you?
Yeah, and I asked him,’’are you trying to propose? ‘’oh, I haven’t proposed to you, yet? Ok, fine. Will you marry me? ‘’ It was as simple as that.
And you said, yes?
I immediately said, yes. And that’s it. The very next day, the entire unit knew about it.
And how was the wedding?
It was five years later. Sundar was very keen that he did something before he married me. He comes from a very humble background. He said, I want to give you all the comforts and status you are used to. So unless I buy a house of my own, I will not get married. My mom was a little against it initially, because he comes from a different caste and mom was not sure what kind of a person he is. I had already been hurt once and Mom was very scared. But my brothers were cool about it. They met him and spoke to him and they were happy that I had found a good guy for myself.
But you had to wait five years to marry.
Yeah, that was fine because we were living together. And that is something that depends on the couple; how sure they are of about each other. Of course we had a problem, we broke up in between and we came back and all those fights have happened for us. We broke up for a day and we came back. Also maybe because it was getting to me that the marriage was taking a long time; it was taking its own toll. I was working around the clock and so was he. We were not able to spend so much time together. And on his part he had this basic fear of losing his freedom.
Has the seven year itch made its appearance?
Oh we did not even realise that the seven years has gone past. Once we were shooting and he called me and asked me to come down for it. When I asked why, he said, ‘’no, please come by.’’ And this was when we were dating. I went to the location and he said,’’ I want you to meet somebody.’’ He called a girl and pointed to me and said,’’ do you know who she is? ‘’ She didn’t know that he was dating me. “I have such a wonderful wife back home. Do you think I’ll even turn and look at you”? The girl was really taken aback. And I said, ‘’don’t do that to her.’’ But Sundar felt they needed to know that they need not be so desperate for work?
No woman’s journey into this point in life is without heartaches? We are talking about the Prabhu episode!
it’s a closed chapter. Everybody knows about my one big heartache. Love is blind. But I’m glad I could come out of it. A lot of people are not able to come out of it. I realized what I was doing was wrong. So, I had to come out of it. You never realize how, where and why it happens. There are no answers. I don’t regret it. But then I also know it was a huge mistake. I have shared a beautiful part of my life during that period. It was beautiful till it lasted. But then, definitely a mistake.
How do you see equations in today’s context?
I think we all forget that the basic need in a relationship is time, which we don’t want to give. We want to keep moving on. If it works, fine. If it doesn’t, you move on. That move on tag, should be removed. A marriage has to be worked upon. We all have our problems. Talk it out. I believe there is a solution to every problem. Don’t keep pushing it under the carpet. Because then, by the time you realize there is a heap of problems for which you don’t find solutions to. If it is an abusive marriage, then you have to walk out. A woman can do better when she is alone, all by herself rather than living in an abusive marriage.
You have very strong views on most things. Were you always like this?
I have always believed in being honest. I have seen my mom in an abusive marriage and she never had the chance to leave being uneducated. Today I’m glad she stays with me. I have a wonderful husband who, when we built this house, said ask you mom to come and stay with us. So, my mom, mom-in-law all of us stay together.
What would you ask of life now?
I don’t believe in God. If I have a question, I try to get an answer. And I don’t ask questions to people who I know can’t give answers. I always question a person, whom I know is close to my heart. And I only question when I am hurt. And the person who can hurt me is obviously the person who is close to me. So they are my family and friends and nobody else. It is as simple as that. Life is what you make of it.
So there is no such thing as being destined?
Nobody can foresee the future. I wonder when the last time Bill Gates saw was his astrologer or whether Obama had an astrology chart made. Obama had to work hard to be where he is today and Bill Gates was intelligent enough to make something out of his life. I always want to see my kids smiling, healthy and definitely making something out of their lives. I want my girls to be financially independent. I would like people to stop interfering in everybody else’s lives and take care of their own. Be honest to yourself. Be confident in what you are doing. Even if you falter. Don’t hesitate to say sorry. But if you are not at fault let the world turn upside down, don’t say sorry.
A parting shot?
Take care. That’s my usual line.
I SMILE---
At sight of kids playing in the rain. Probably to hear the giggle of a small kid, the laughter. My day starts with looking at both my kids in the morning. I think that’s the best sight in the world. As my husband puts it, as soon as the school starts, there is a Mahabharata at home every morning till I take them and drop them at school.
I LIKE SHOPPING FOR:
Saris. I love saris. But I am also very comfortable with cotton salwars, mix and match. I hate getting them stitched because invariably the tailors goof up. I love to shop at Fab India, Anokhee.
EATING OUT IS SUCH FUN:
Thai at Lotus and Benjarong. I also like Dakshin at the Park Sheraton.I cook at home and I can make everything except south Indian.
WHAT COLORS ME BEST:
All the earthen shades. Browns and yellows.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Check these out
Okay.
So I get to do interviews with some of the most interesting people in the field of arts. How many actually get to read them? A couple of thousands? Maybe a few hundreds? And how many are going to be reading them out here? In this cyber jungle?
I really don't know. But the thing is, these are some cool views. So if you do get a chance to browse through........
The place where he is he can afford to be pricey, distant and with attitude. And its not just because he is someone with such a huge fan following. Apart from being a star in every sense he is also someone with tremendous skills when it comes to portraying a character on screen and as a testimony to that is the fact that awards have come by the dozens. But even if that were an obvious sign of his formidable talent it is the common man who knows that here is an actor who believes in whatever he takes up. And in that belief he brings conviction, sincerity and an edge over others. he therefore is high on that list of dream actors to work with- a man who passion for cinema translates into a dedicated following and adherence to a role- be it of any size- and then sits back to watch the impact he makes.
Meeting him in Kolkata as he shoots for an extended schedule of Mani Ratnam’s Raavana, he reminds one of how he casually endears himself to all those around him. A sense of being grounded also makes him empathetic to people around him and he invariably goes that extra mile to ensure that one is not left stranded. And this quality is something that one has seen over the years in all the interaction one has had with him. You just know that with Vikram around things will get done. One gets talking as he waits to be called for his shot and you discover the passion and commitment to what he does is so completely inherent.
Things happening right now
A lot of excitement, because I’m working with my dream director. It is like a long extended workshop cum holiday-- Chalakudy, Madhya Pradesh and now here at Kolkata. We have been working almost continuously.
The experience that is now
I like working like this. Even with Bala it is like that. When we do a film we just get into it. If it takes time that is ok. There are no distractions this way. And I think this would be one of my most strenuous films. Chalakudy was about rocks and forests; Kolkata is totally dust and all of us are coughing and sneezing in every scene; and Madhya Pradesh was cold and misty.
The preparation that goes into it
Characters evolved as per the scene. Mani Sir is trying to do something that is different –that’s his style. Every scene is out of the ordinary. Forget about whether the film is going to be a hit or not, it is an experience. Every scene is like going to war.
The way it is approached always
There is no easy way out. Even if it is in the middle of the water maybe or under the waterfall, Mani sir will say, ‘’do it this way’’. He will push, push, push – under the waterfall he will,’’ say don’t blink. I don’t want you blinking in the shot.’’ Every scene I think ‘my God we did it!’ I am not exaggerating. When you see the film you will know.
An experience of a lifetime
It is fantastic. It is my dream. I have always felt I needed to work with him right from when I was in college. I would think that if I act with Mani sir and Shankar sir (Shankar sir came little later) I will retire. And he has not let me down in my expectations.
Getting into the skin of the character
I simply get into the character. My brand of performing—acting—is, I will try and get into that look and character. Which is why I am saying I love it when its a long schedule. I like being by myself. Now if I am a brute in this movie, I am going to be like a brute. I am going to be very callous. I am going to be very crude. When I was doing Pithamagan I was like that.
Its all a continuous process
For me, it is a continuous process. Yet I keep one side open. I am going to be rigid about it. But in Pithamagan I am very rigid because Bala and I had already decided that this is how it is going to be. If you take Maja I felt it was the film I enjoyed most in making. Kandhasamy is another film where I have tried out everything. Susi is like that. If I say Susi have you ever tried surfing? And he will make a scene out of that. Bala’s Pithamagan is a film I evolved as an actor. Bala is a creator par excellence. He is in a different range altogether. I am not a creator. But as an actor when I am with him, I become like a creator.
The passion keeps it going
Kandhasamy is again a tough film. Susi would take a lot of shots and each one would take a lot of time. Every shot is perfect. So five seconds of a shot would have taken the whole day. In those five seconds you expect that exact, that particular emotion, which will encompass everything in that character. And no, I don’t lose my patience because I sit around and take my time.
The face behind the macho image
I like fights; it has nothing to do with what is going on. I just cannot seem to do soft, romantic roles. That seems to be my problem. It is so strange. The movies I watch are always romantic, soft comedies, feel good films. I’ve only watched films like My Best Friend’s Wedding and 50 First Dates and things like that. I am trying to tread two paths--do films that are totally performance oriented or do films where the character is very powerful and aggressive.
A case of being in a place that needs a macho look
No. Rajini Sir came in doing different roles. After a particular point, he got into this hero thing. Kamal Sir was always doing the same thing, but after a particular point he changed over to this. For a long time, I was not caught in any image. But I cannot do a soft film and make it run. And then there is a paucity of scripts in Tamil. It does not seem to be like that in the Hindi industry. I would for instance love to do what Akshay Kumar is doing; Shahrukh is doing, Farhaan Akhtar is doing.
The lure of Bollywood
No, not really. I’m totally happy with what I am doing here. I am comfortable with the language and this is my terrain. If the director says something, I would know I what I am doing. I don’t want to be in a movie where I need to understand my dialogues first. I am very happy in Tamil. Not just Tamil, its South India-- Telugu, Tamil, Malayalam, Kannada. I would only work on another Mani Ratnam movie or probably a Rakesh Mehra film; a Sanjay Leela Bhansali. Or a Dil Chahta Hai-- I love that kind of a film.
An actor par excellence
I would love to work with Aamir Khan. I think he is fantastic. In India we always think that a director is someone who does his own scripts--abroad they get stories from someone and recreate it on celluloid. How Aamir translated a script onto the screen is fantastic. When I saw Taare Amen Par I was so taken in.
Script and story matters
At some point, I think every actor will want to do something like his own script or direction. Five years or ten years down the line I will surely be doing something like that. Come to think of it, all of us are assistant directors. In every film I think I am an assistant director—to Mani Ratnam, Bala, Shankar. Sometimes every actor wants to direct and I’ve always wanted to direct.
Direction and me
I would love to do adventure films. Or something that is totally performance based. I would love to direct films that are totally not mainstream at all or do something that is total joy. It has to be a wholesome entertainer.
Working with Aishwarya and Abhishek- an experience that is great.
Abhishek and I have been friends for long. The moment he is there is vibrancy on the sets. As soon as a shot is over, he will come and tell me, ‘’Kenny Sir, this place- it’s little tricky. Watch this stone and there is this route and when you stand there. ‘’ Or he will say,’ I don’t think you need to worry about glycerine, because its a long shot.’’ Likewise, when I finish my shot and come, I’ll tell him,’’Abhishek, this is it. It’s damn nice.’’ As for ash I think it is very difficult being Ash-- being the most beautiful woman in the world and people always watching her. On the sets, she is professional to the core. As a co-star very encouraging.
Looking back
I had all these dreams of what I wanted to do-- this long struggle. Suddenly, I reached a point where I went beyond what my dreams were. Now I have gotten into that zone where I am very comfortable doing what I love doing, doing it with the best people around. I feel a deep sense of contentment and happiness. Make your hobby your profession and you never have to work one day in your life, which is exactly what I am doing. I have reached that point where I want to do other things, for instance, I’ve started singing, which is not going to be a profession. Like that direction some time.
The urge to move is also there
Yet I am very restless in the sense there is a Selvaraghavan film in the offing and I am thinking, ‘’God! I can’t wait to get into that character. I want to do it yesterday.’’ I only feel Tamil cinema can evolve more, become more like Hindi. We were doing much better films than Hindi. But Hindi films, suddenly over the last five years because of the NRI, overseas, have evolved into something so huge. As an actor I feel we are little deprived there. We are still into only violence; we are still into only rowdism. The softer films are always small budget films.
Best film, best role till date.
Something I feel very close to is Sethu-- which is why I stuck to that Chiyan thing. That is the pot of gold after the rainbow. That rainbow took a long time to materialise. Its like my baby. We went through so much to get that baby out. As an actor, Anniyan is a role any actor would give his right hand to do. I love Dhool and Sami because they were the commercial thing. Dharini taught me this kind of cinema. Kasi and Pithamagan because of the National Award.
No film would be worth it if…
It was just for money. I want to do that perfect film, which is always happening. I want to work with directors like that. It is very difficult to convince me to do something that I am not comfortable with. I am a director’s actor. The director should feel I want to work with this guy again.
Vikram, apart from movies and acting.
What I am on and off screen, are two different people. At home my mobile phone is off. And when I am here my folks can never reach me. At home we live in this sweet little house which is somewhere in Besant Nagar where I can just go walking. I hate to be recognized; I like my space; when I go out with my family, I don’t want to be bothered. I do very normal things. I like to go to the theatre, whether its Sathyam or Mayajaal. I like to go get my own videos. I just drive by and go to the shop and get it. I like to go into departmental stores. I am comfortable in rubber slippers.
The man at home
Here there are five security people. When I go to the gym, I go alone like anybody. My kids will call and say,’’ Appa, come back this evening.’’ Why? Because they want to go to the theatre. So I become the driver. I love that.
Belief in God and Self
Of course I believe in God. And if He were to grant me three wishes, I would ask that I am an actor again in my next life. I want to be Vikram again with my family and friends. But this joy or whatever I am feeling doing all these characters- doing what I love best- I would want it to come quicker. It shouldn’t take all these years. And then I would love for this recession to take a backseat.
Wisdom and my take
Cinema and what has been made of it is because of you all. We reflect what people want. I am very thankful that people are able to appreciate the effort I am putting in. I only wish people are more open to new subjects and that encourages us too. We all live only once. We should all just enjoy life and follow our dreams.
**************************
A few of my favorite things
The color black.
Japanese food--sushi and all that.
The song Uyire. And now Miaow Miaow from Kandhasamy.
Jeans, Hawaii slippers and just some old t-shirt.
The movie Nayagan. And for a long time Gladiator.
A place I love is New Zealand.
A word I use often thank you and sorry.
So I get to do interviews with some of the most interesting people in the field of arts. How many actually get to read them? A couple of thousands? Maybe a few hundreds? And how many are going to be reading them out here? In this cyber jungle?
I really don't know. But the thing is, these are some cool views. So if you do get a chance to browse through........
The place where he is he can afford to be pricey, distant and with attitude. And its not just because he is someone with such a huge fan following. Apart from being a star in every sense he is also someone with tremendous skills when it comes to portraying a character on screen and as a testimony to that is the fact that awards have come by the dozens. But even if that were an obvious sign of his formidable talent it is the common man who knows that here is an actor who believes in whatever he takes up. And in that belief he brings conviction, sincerity and an edge over others. he therefore is high on that list of dream actors to work with- a man who passion for cinema translates into a dedicated following and adherence to a role- be it of any size- and then sits back to watch the impact he makes.
Meeting him in Kolkata as he shoots for an extended schedule of Mani Ratnam’s Raavana, he reminds one of how he casually endears himself to all those around him. A sense of being grounded also makes him empathetic to people around him and he invariably goes that extra mile to ensure that one is not left stranded. And this quality is something that one has seen over the years in all the interaction one has had with him. You just know that with Vikram around things will get done. One gets talking as he waits to be called for his shot and you discover the passion and commitment to what he does is so completely inherent.
Things happening right now
A lot of excitement, because I’m working with my dream director. It is like a long extended workshop cum holiday-- Chalakudy, Madhya Pradesh and now here at Kolkata. We have been working almost continuously.
The experience that is now
I like working like this. Even with Bala it is like that. When we do a film we just get into it. If it takes time that is ok. There are no distractions this way. And I think this would be one of my most strenuous films. Chalakudy was about rocks and forests; Kolkata is totally dust and all of us are coughing and sneezing in every scene; and Madhya Pradesh was cold and misty.
The preparation that goes into it
Characters evolved as per the scene. Mani Sir is trying to do something that is different –that’s his style. Every scene is out of the ordinary. Forget about whether the film is going to be a hit or not, it is an experience. Every scene is like going to war.
The way it is approached always
There is no easy way out. Even if it is in the middle of the water maybe or under the waterfall, Mani sir will say, ‘’do it this way’’. He will push, push, push – under the waterfall he will,’’ say don’t blink. I don’t want you blinking in the shot.’’ Every scene I think ‘my God we did it!’ I am not exaggerating. When you see the film you will know.
An experience of a lifetime
It is fantastic. It is my dream. I have always felt I needed to work with him right from when I was in college. I would think that if I act with Mani sir and Shankar sir (Shankar sir came little later) I will retire. And he has not let me down in my expectations.
Getting into the skin of the character
I simply get into the character. My brand of performing—acting—is, I will try and get into that look and character. Which is why I am saying I love it when its a long schedule. I like being by myself. Now if I am a brute in this movie, I am going to be like a brute. I am going to be very callous. I am going to be very crude. When I was doing Pithamagan I was like that.
Its all a continuous process
For me, it is a continuous process. Yet I keep one side open. I am going to be rigid about it. But in Pithamagan I am very rigid because Bala and I had already decided that this is how it is going to be. If you take Maja I felt it was the film I enjoyed most in making. Kandhasamy is another film where I have tried out everything. Susi is like that. If I say Susi have you ever tried surfing? And he will make a scene out of that. Bala’s Pithamagan is a film I evolved as an actor. Bala is a creator par excellence. He is in a different range altogether. I am not a creator. But as an actor when I am with him, I become like a creator.
The passion keeps it going
Kandhasamy is again a tough film. Susi would take a lot of shots and each one would take a lot of time. Every shot is perfect. So five seconds of a shot would have taken the whole day. In those five seconds you expect that exact, that particular emotion, which will encompass everything in that character. And no, I don’t lose my patience because I sit around and take my time.
The face behind the macho image
I like fights; it has nothing to do with what is going on. I just cannot seem to do soft, romantic roles. That seems to be my problem. It is so strange. The movies I watch are always romantic, soft comedies, feel good films. I’ve only watched films like My Best Friend’s Wedding and 50 First Dates and things like that. I am trying to tread two paths--do films that are totally performance oriented or do films where the character is very powerful and aggressive.
A case of being in a place that needs a macho look
No. Rajini Sir came in doing different roles. After a particular point, he got into this hero thing. Kamal Sir was always doing the same thing, but after a particular point he changed over to this. For a long time, I was not caught in any image. But I cannot do a soft film and make it run. And then there is a paucity of scripts in Tamil. It does not seem to be like that in the Hindi industry. I would for instance love to do what Akshay Kumar is doing; Shahrukh is doing, Farhaan Akhtar is doing.
The lure of Bollywood
No, not really. I’m totally happy with what I am doing here. I am comfortable with the language and this is my terrain. If the director says something, I would know I what I am doing. I don’t want to be in a movie where I need to understand my dialogues first. I am very happy in Tamil. Not just Tamil, its South India-- Telugu, Tamil, Malayalam, Kannada. I would only work on another Mani Ratnam movie or probably a Rakesh Mehra film; a Sanjay Leela Bhansali. Or a Dil Chahta Hai-- I love that kind of a film.
An actor par excellence
I would love to work with Aamir Khan. I think he is fantastic. In India we always think that a director is someone who does his own scripts--abroad they get stories from someone and recreate it on celluloid. How Aamir translated a script onto the screen is fantastic. When I saw Taare Amen Par I was so taken in.
Script and story matters
At some point, I think every actor will want to do something like his own script or direction. Five years or ten years down the line I will surely be doing something like that. Come to think of it, all of us are assistant directors. In every film I think I am an assistant director—to Mani Ratnam, Bala, Shankar. Sometimes every actor wants to direct and I’ve always wanted to direct.
Direction and me
I would love to do adventure films. Or something that is totally performance based. I would love to direct films that are totally not mainstream at all or do something that is total joy. It has to be a wholesome entertainer.
Working with Aishwarya and Abhishek- an experience that is great.
Abhishek and I have been friends for long. The moment he is there is vibrancy on the sets. As soon as a shot is over, he will come and tell me, ‘’Kenny Sir, this place- it’s little tricky. Watch this stone and there is this route and when you stand there. ‘’ Or he will say,’ I don’t think you need to worry about glycerine, because its a long shot.’’ Likewise, when I finish my shot and come, I’ll tell him,’’Abhishek, this is it. It’s damn nice.’’ As for ash I think it is very difficult being Ash-- being the most beautiful woman in the world and people always watching her. On the sets, she is professional to the core. As a co-star very encouraging.
Looking back
I had all these dreams of what I wanted to do-- this long struggle. Suddenly, I reached a point where I went beyond what my dreams were. Now I have gotten into that zone where I am very comfortable doing what I love doing, doing it with the best people around. I feel a deep sense of contentment and happiness. Make your hobby your profession and you never have to work one day in your life, which is exactly what I am doing. I have reached that point where I want to do other things, for instance, I’ve started singing, which is not going to be a profession. Like that direction some time.
The urge to move is also there
Yet I am very restless in the sense there is a Selvaraghavan film in the offing and I am thinking, ‘’God! I can’t wait to get into that character. I want to do it yesterday.’’ I only feel Tamil cinema can evolve more, become more like Hindi. We were doing much better films than Hindi. But Hindi films, suddenly over the last five years because of the NRI, overseas, have evolved into something so huge. As an actor I feel we are little deprived there. We are still into only violence; we are still into only rowdism. The softer films are always small budget films.
Best film, best role till date.
Something I feel very close to is Sethu-- which is why I stuck to that Chiyan thing. That is the pot of gold after the rainbow. That rainbow took a long time to materialise. Its like my baby. We went through so much to get that baby out. As an actor, Anniyan is a role any actor would give his right hand to do. I love Dhool and Sami because they were the commercial thing. Dharini taught me this kind of cinema. Kasi and Pithamagan because of the National Award.
No film would be worth it if…
It was just for money. I want to do that perfect film, which is always happening. I want to work with directors like that. It is very difficult to convince me to do something that I am not comfortable with. I am a director’s actor. The director should feel I want to work with this guy again.
Vikram, apart from movies and acting.
What I am on and off screen, are two different people. At home my mobile phone is off. And when I am here my folks can never reach me. At home we live in this sweet little house which is somewhere in Besant Nagar where I can just go walking. I hate to be recognized; I like my space; when I go out with my family, I don’t want to be bothered. I do very normal things. I like to go to the theatre, whether its Sathyam or Mayajaal. I like to go get my own videos. I just drive by and go to the shop and get it. I like to go into departmental stores. I am comfortable in rubber slippers.
The man at home
Here there are five security people. When I go to the gym, I go alone like anybody. My kids will call and say,’’ Appa, come back this evening.’’ Why? Because they want to go to the theatre. So I become the driver. I love that.
Belief in God and Self
Of course I believe in God. And if He were to grant me three wishes, I would ask that I am an actor again in my next life. I want to be Vikram again with my family and friends. But this joy or whatever I am feeling doing all these characters- doing what I love best- I would want it to come quicker. It shouldn’t take all these years. And then I would love for this recession to take a backseat.
Wisdom and my take
Cinema and what has been made of it is because of you all. We reflect what people want. I am very thankful that people are able to appreciate the effort I am putting in. I only wish people are more open to new subjects and that encourages us too. We all live only once. We should all just enjoy life and follow our dreams.
**************************
A few of my favorite things
The color black.
Japanese food--sushi and all that.
The song Uyire. And now Miaow Miaow from Kandhasamy.
Jeans, Hawaii slippers and just some old t-shirt.
The movie Nayagan. And for a long time Gladiator.
A place I love is New Zealand.
A word I use often thank you and sorry.
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